I love how outraged many in the media are about how a self-admitted and civilly adjudicated sex abuser is appointing an alleged sexual abuser to lead a US department that has a serious problem with sexual abusers and obfuscating that behavior among its ranks. The inability to see the forest through the trees idiom comes to mind.
It’s been three weeks since president-elect Donald Trump nominated Fox News host Pete Hegseth to lead his Department of Defense. While some journalists and pundits have written and given their opinions on the serious lack of qualifications Hegseth brings to the table, most have chosen to focus on the multiple allegations spanning years about his alleged excessive and on-the-job drinking habits and alleged sexual abuse/harassment. Even sitting senators are stating that Hegseth cannot be the Secretary of Defense because of his alleged abuse towards women. They note that women do currently serve in the military even in combat missions, a fact that Hegseth has stated he will reverse.
Maybe this pressure about the alleged sexual misconduct will force Hegseth to step down from the nomination, maybe it won’t. But this constant handwringing by the media about another man with sexual misconduct allegations and whether that is disqualifying for any job has left me…confused. Not because I do not agree that they should be disqualifying, but because I know that such allegations are rarely disqualifying these days.
For starters, Trump himself is a sexual abuser, both self-admitted and adjudicated. He is also responsible for nominating Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh. Justice Kavanaugh’s alleged victim came forward to testify against him in the same manner that Justice Clarence Thomas’ alleged victim had done when he was nominated, yet both were still confirmed. And so the level of outrage from the media that Trump would nominate someone with sexual abuse allegations feels disingenuous at best, trolling at worst.
I say trolling because I cannot wrap my head around the possibility that anyone in media or politics might not be aware of how severe our rape culture is in this country. I cannot tell if these people are genuinely disturbed by sexual abusers in positions of power or if they are just saying they are because that is how we are conditioned to talk about sexual abuse: as an anomaly, an abnormality.
But the truth is that is ubiquitous.
Sexual abuse victims are created when they are toddlers, children, teenagers, young adults, middle age and senior citizens. Victims are poor, middle class and wealthy. The abusers, both alleged and adjudicated, are family, worship leaders, co-workers, fellow students, teachers, coaches, doctors, lawyers, soldiers, cops, heads of law enforcement, judges, prison guards, dentists, assisted care givers and even morticians. Tell me when in a life that sexual abuse does not occur, and I will tell you that you are a liar.
Sexual abuse is everywhere, and rarely is it ever held to account. According to RAINN (Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network), for every 1,000 sexual assaults, 975 abusers will walk away with no charges. Most victims do not report because those who are supposed to protect them and provide accountability often have robust rape cultures of their own.
Even the federal government has ignored the complaints of their own employees for decades, only to occasionally promise investigations into the rampant coverups of sexual abuse within their own ranks. When their complaints are taken seriously, the most victims can hope for is a monetary pay off after years of investigations via the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) that acts as a sort of investigator for the government in not only sexual harassment cases, but ones that involve actual abuse as well. The extent of the harm within the federal service is unknown because the agency, citing privacy laws, refuses to allow their data to be studied by independent scholars. Victims are often not allowed to know what disciplinary actions were taken against their abusers and are required to supply their own attorneys in their cases, while their abusers are often assisted by individual agency union attorneys.
Notably, EEOC was once headed by alleged sexual harasser and now Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas. He was Anita Hill’s supervisor at EEOC.
Those who act surprised by any of this or wonder why Trump thinks he can do this are refusing to admit that this is who we are as a culture. This is the president who himself has multiple allegations and a conviction of sexual abuse. He is the same president who appointed a man with multiple allegations of sexual abuse and who was then still able to become a Supreme Court justice. A Supreme Court justice who then voted to overturn Roe v. Wade which has led to women dying unnecessarily and forced over 64,000 others to carry the baby of their rapists.
What makes anyone think they would not confirm Hegseth? It would be surprising if they did not.
Our refusal to admit that our own country has a massive rape culture that encourages sexual abuse, that has created systems that protect those committing sexual abuse, that refuses to mandate all federal employees submit their DNA to be run with CODIS (Combined DNA Index System) as they already do with their fingerprints, that denies us the ability to even hold hearings or even study the problem lest we offend the offenders,...all this is why these abusers can become cops, doctors, lawyers, judges, heads of federal departments and even the president.
Sexual abuse in America is an epidemic.
They just refuse to admit it.