It most certainly was a night to remember. June 27, 2024 was not only my 53rd birthday, it was the first debate between incumbent President Joe Biden and former President Donald Trump. I have been dreading this moment all year; not because I'm getting older, but because last night was exactly what I expected to happen.
When I woke up this morning, I was exhausted. The normal first degree burn feeling I have in my hands and forearms was a second degree burn feeling, which is not normal after sleeping eight hours. My head ached, my eyes were bloodshot, and my heart kept racing. None of this is from partying too hard on my birthday, but from watching that horror film of a debate. This is a trauma response that started occurring to me after my suicide attempt; restless sleep, nerves on edge, violent moments of suddenly awakening but not knowing why.
My body is responding to extreme stress.
When Biden first took office, attorneys that worked within congressional Homeland Security committees on the Democrat-side would call and ask my opinion on what would help them gain the Border Patrol's support. Programs like giving agents a giant raise and allowing ex-agents like myself to rejoin were all shot down by me. I would explain to them that that the Border Patrol was a right-wing, corruption pit that saw Trump as their leader. Agents literally call him "Daddy." Democrats stopped calling after I asked if anyone in the Biden Administration ever recognizes that an insurrection just happened, the Border Patrol was just down the street armed and ready and did not respond. "Is anyone up there taking this seriously?" I recall asking.
The feeling that Biden and his administration did not grasp the severity of the insurrection, their desire to return to normal, to pretend that it would just go away, the Department of Justice's refusal to investigate and try and hold Trump and other leaders accountable...it all became evident last night.
We are fucked.
There's no denying that the Biden Administration has been extremely careful in how Biden is presented publicly. Last night's endless blank stares with his mouth gaping open, inability to finish a thought, breathless pacing, mumbling...he looked like he wasn't mentally present. Saying that he beat Covid and Medicare? Trump was not wrong to point out that Biden might not even understand what he was saying. There were a number of times where Biden did not make sense.
Trump was Trump: lying about everything, loud, bombastic, racist, fear-mongering, anti-immigrant, misogynistic, criminal, conman. He didn't answer questions he didn't want to answer, and he was also much more, shall we say, alive than Biden. If you are not a politics nerd, if you have a busy life just trying to keep up, this is likely your take away: Biden is old and fragile, Trump is old but strong. The rallies where Trump went on and on and made little sense were either meant to give the impression that he was old and feeble, or that is just the way he speaks when he has no time limits. It could also simply be that the rallies are where he gets his practice and figures out what works with his audience. Last night was the culmination of all those rallies; the best of the best Trump rhetoric.
I have been struggling with the thought of voting for Joe Biden. He has lied over and over to immigrant communities and migrants. He has doubled down on Trump era border policies. He has covered up the crimes, rape culture and coverup teams of the US Border Patrol. Biden is currently funding and providing weapons of mass destruction to Israel to genocide Palestinians. This administration has not taken the January 6th Insurrection, the overturning of Roe v. Wade and the corruption on the Supreme Court which is also part of the Insurrection seriously.
I feel the need to send a strong message to the Democrats. Enough of the status quo. We have been saying for years that we wanted a woman of color. Democrats keep ignoring this. They should of had an open primary. Frankly, I think we should have one. It's not too late. Either an open primary, or Biden steps down and Harris steps in since she is already Vice-President.